By Situation Theatre 11/04/2016
If the Libs don't protect bankers' wealth, who will?
Outraged over Labor’s plan to investigate something the vast majority of Australians want investigated, the Prime Minister has announced a Royal Commission into Labor’s decision.
The Liberal government has grave concerns Labor’s inquiry may hurt the feelings of bankers. As such they have launched an inquiry into whether Labor’s Royal Commission could indeed cause sadness or discomfort for bankers.
The PM said “Last week you’ll note I attended a lavish lunch provided by Westpac and told them in no uncertain terms they had been a bit naughty. Problem solved.”
He continued: “A comprehensive two-year inquiry into the financial sector is totally unnecessary. So we’ve pledged $500 million for a two year inquiry of our own to prove just how unnecessary Labor’s plans really are.”