By Situation Theatre 6/11/2019
Morrison will also draft laws to re-introduce the death penalty for any Australian speaking louder than you would in a library.
Leader of the satirically named Liberal Party, Scott “How Loud Am I?” Morrison, has stepped up his war on everyone except the rich by promising a diverse array of medieval punishments for failure to engage in appropriate foreplay with coal before bringing it to climax.
Anyone caught interacting in anything louder than a whisper will be placed in stocks and forced to listen to the audiobook of The Complete Columns of Andrew Bolt.
All climate scientists will have their hands and feet tied together and thrown in water. If they float they are guilty and if they sink they are also guilty.
The heads of all climate activists will be placed on spikes and each member of Morrison Government will take turns doing what David Cameron did to that pig.