By Situation Theatre 31/08/2015
GAY CLASS UPROAR. It was the headline that broke the homophobic camel’s back. Following the abomination that was the Daily Telegraph’s fictionalised account of events at Burwood girls, journalists at the paper cracked it and said, in unison, 'I’m sick of this shit'. After years of swallowing and excreting whatever Daddy Bird Rupert Murdoch vomited up, fed up workers have thrown off the yoke of their News Corp oppressors and created a worker co-operative.
The new worker managed publication will operate according to principles of democracy, equity and solidarity. It will will immediately move to broadsheet form and change its name to The Daily Worker.
As the first order of business they’ve ordered an unconditional apology for all past headlines, but especially these ones:
A press release from the new incarnation of the masthead read:
‘On behalf of everyone here at The Daily Worker we’d just like to say we are really, really sorry for everything we’ve ever done in the past. Our sense of shame for scapegoating oppressed groups, delaying climate action and spreading homophobic, xenophobic, sexist, oligarchic bile is overwhelming. We know we can never make it up to you, but we’re going to damn well try. The era of news for the 1% is over. We are the 99%.’
The Daily Worker has vowed to quit using The Daily Telegraph Headline Generator and start researching their stories.