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By Situation Theatre 25/09/2019. Updated 19/05/2020.
Albo seemed to get a bit confused when he said “you have stolen my dreams and my childhood with your empty words” before saying “How good is Adani?”
Now that public figures with principles like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Greta Thunberg and Jacinda Ardern have gone viral, Labor has gone into urgent meetings to work out how they can appear more authentic.
According to their focus group research overnight, apparently people generally prefer their leaders to actually lead them with conviction rather than equivocate on every major policy issue, supplicate to the electorate’s worst instincts, and cravenly bow to financial interests and the Government as they take a hacksaw to our democracy and to the planet.
As a result, Albo is expected to announce an iron-clad commitment to bold climate action later today in Melbourne, before flying to the Galilee Basin for a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the Carmichael mine.