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Situation Theatre

July 5, 2019

App Store Crashes Upon Release Of New App Blocking Stories About Israel Folau

by Sarah Johnson


Apple Support

Apple Support

Apple Support

Apple Support

By Situation Theatre 5/7/2019

Apple technicians are working frantically to ensure people’s burning passion to never hear the words “Israel Folau” again doesn’t break their company.

Carnage has hit the backend of Apple’s online store as well as the streets of Australia’s capital cities this morning with millions of Australians clamouring to get their hands on any technology which will prevent all news about homophobic rugby players and the federal government’s mindless culture war of distraction ever entering their consciousness again.

Queues not seen since the release of the iPhone XS are currently snaking around the CBDs of all the nation’s major cities with consumers shivering with excitement and cold at the thought of never having to be reminded of just how badly John Howard’s politics stuffed this country.

Apparently there are add-ons which will also block all material associated with Donald Trump, Scott Morrrison, as well as the phrase “How good is…”.

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